“Love must have wings to fly away from love and to fly back again” Edwin Arlington Robinson
It can be music to your ears or it can make you want to move to Timbuktu, but if what you had was a deep or long term relationship, it’s often a confusing thing when you see signs that your ex wants you back. When this happens, it throws you off balance because depending on the basis of your breakup, you may doubt his intentions or your ability to be with him again.
What to Do When Your Ex Wants You Back
These mixed signals can overwhelm you emotionally because you’ll naturally find yourself having rosy memories of the happier days, sour feelings about the bad times and something cloudy in between. You also need to be able to tell whether what he has are just feelings of nostalgia, or if he’s actually interested in getting back together.
So it’s important to first gain perspective and give this possibility a realistic view.
Instead of talking to friends and family who are likely to confuse you even more, why not take a holistic approach that will help you calm down and work through it with a clear mind.
That way whether you want to take your ex back or not is your prerogative and that decision can be informed by these 15 sure signs that he wants you back.
15 Sure Signs That Your Ex Wants To Be With You Again
There are two kinds of scenarios to be considered here:
A. The one where you still keep in touch with your ex
B. The one where there is no contact at all
The signs for both scenarios are not the same, and this is why this article is tailor-made for you, depending on the situation you’re in.
A. If You Still Keep in Touch
1. He will say it
This first sign is a no brainer. It’s as simple and straightforward as it can be. He wants you back, you’ll not have to dig in between the lines, he will simply say it.
2. He’s very warm with you
Do you remember how warm and loving he used to be during the honeymoon period? That’s how he gets whenever he’s around you. If he speaks in soft tones or whispers lovingly or in a caring manner then this is a sign that your ex secretly wants you back. He will be a little more affectionate like he was back when you first met him. Men have a tendency to show more affection when they want you back in their lives.
3. He wants to go over what went wrong
If he tries to appeal to you by going over the mistakes he made and telling you how he would do things differently, then he wants you back.
4. Makes effort to change
Your ex will show a lot of proof that he is working on himself, depending on what the reason for the breakup was. He may for instance stop getting drunk all the time and instead join a gym or something else just to show you that he’s a changed man. You may also notice the effort he makes with his looks too. He may look more handsome than usual whenever you meet him. All this change is aimed at you taking him back.
5. When he still shares significant stuff
If you’re the first person he calls whenever something important happens to him, then you still matter to him. Perhaps he wants your opinion, or simply to share his important moments with you because he still wants you to be part of his life.
6. He’s always there for you
Something happens to you, either good or bad, and before you know it, he’s there with you. He makes sure he is always present in time of need and stays interested in what is going on in your life. This is a clear sign that your ex wants you back but won’t admit it.
7. The dating scene
Your ex-boyfriend will try to hold on before dating again, and in case he goes out with someone else, he will make sure he hides it from you. On the flip side of that, he will want to know if you’re seeing anyone yet. He will also get jealous when he sees you around any other man. This shows that he still hopes for a second chance.
8. He enjoys trips down memory Lane, links them to the future
Does your ex still remind you of your anniversary, birthday, places or stuff you‘ve done together? If you find that he is clingy on those sweet old memories and wants to talk about them with you, he’s simply trying to revive the good old feelings and wants you to feel them all over again. And when he links this to possible future plans, he definitely wants to try to revive the relationship again.
9. He doesn’t pick up his stuff from your place
When a man has intentions to get back together with you, he will avoid closure. Not picking up his stuff from your place or keeping your belongings at his place is a good way for him to leave an open door. It allows an opportunity for him to see you and possibly have a conversation.
10. He will try to seduce you
This is a man you’ve been with for a while. He absolutely understands how you’re conditioned, knows what turns you on and he knows what works for you. If he tries to attract you with gifts or messages, or if he teases you with sensual body language when you’re together, you will know it when you see it.
B. If You Don’t Keep in Touch
11. He asks and talks about you
In a situation where you are not in contact with your ex, he will ask about you, especially from your mutual friends. He will also wax lyrical about you and this constant conversation about you shows signs that he wants you back but won’t admit it.
12. He is everywhere
Have you ever broken up with your man and suddenly he seems to be everywhere you go? Did you think this was a coincidence? Well it wasn’t. Your ex pretty much knows your schedule and the places you hang out, and if you notice him frequently in almost all the places you go, then he is deliberately trying to see you and be seen.
13. He contacts you for no apparent reason
If he calls you to ask about stuff he could easily find on Google, he’s just trying to open the lines of communication. What makes it even more interesting is if he calls you when he’s been drinking. Booze is liquid courage, so this is a real sign that your ex wants you back but is scared.
14. Your indifference kills him
The opposite of love isn’t hate, it is indifference, and when your ex sees how indifferent you are about him, he gets upset and isn’t shy to show it. He sees this as a sign that you’re over him. What this means for you is that he isn’t over you, and is not trying to be. He still hopes to get you back.
15. Fits of unwarranted anger
If your ex goes beyond jealousy to anger whenever he sees you flirting or having a friendly conversation with another man, then it’s obvious he’s still into you. He could take this further and even snap at you for talking (with enthusiasm) to someone else, or even cause a fight. You don’t need more evidence.
People usually don’t know what they have until they lose it. And this is the point where your ex-boyfriend will try to win you back after he realises that he still needs you. It can be confusing for you, but with a clear mind, it’s easy to identify these 15 sure signs that your ex wants to be with you again.
If he doesn’t say it, he will show you with his warmth that he has changed for the better; he will be there for you and will enjoy reminiscing with you. He will try to catch your attention with phone calls and will want to involve you in all the important things in his life. He will even refuse to pick up his stuff, just so that he can leave room for an opportunity to talk to you. Possibly even seduce you.
And if you won’t “coincidentally” run into him everywhere you go then your friends will tell you everything he’s been saying and asking about you. And once you have decided on what to say when your ex wants you back, then you will march to the beat of your own drum. You know, boomerangs are not the only things that return to you.